Regular

At the end of the year we always have spirit week and the seniors usually bring glow sticks. One asshole freshman thought it would be a good idea to break open 30 glow sticks and dump the liquid into the boy’s bathroom toilets.

They never caught him

Regular

A kid in my class has hair that’s the color of cabbage and he will agressively compliment you if you speak badly about yourself.

He drinks pickle juice. From a thermos.

He dropped his thermos in Mandarin and cried for five minutes.

Regular

Fun in Food Science & Technology

-“YOU LICKED GEORGE WASHINGTON’S CRACK?”

-“Future Farmers of America? More like Future Failures of America.”

-A kid: “Did you know a group of bananas is called a gang?”

The entire class, several times: “Banana gang.”

-“Do you want me to rubber band YOUR nuts off, JT?!?”

-The teacher: “A mature male horse is called a stallion, or stud, much like me.”

-“I’ve gotta admit, that styrofoam caterpillar is looking pretty sexy.”

“That’s not a caterpillar.”

“Whatever. Still sexy.”

-“That ladybug hung itself because it knew it was doomed to an eternity of this class.”

-Some kid getting called “P-NUT” by the entire class, including the teacher

-“That’s the juiciest hot dog I’ve ever laid eyes on.”

-“I’m gonna drown you in these baked beans if you don’t put in more barbecue sauce.”

-Some kid is forced to do 20 pushups for every curse word he says, ends up doing 60 in the span of a few minutes and then has to beg the teacher for forgiveness each time.

-“QUIT EATING THE FUCKING ONIONS”

-“The PIG has been STORED.”

-A kid said “creeper” in the middle of very loud conversations going on in class and at least five people(myself included) replied “aww man”

“Aren’t rice krispies just puffed up oats?”

“YOU look like a puffed up oat.”

[Kids trying to buy cows from the teacher]

A kid accidentally said “Milf cow” instead of “milk cow” and some other kid told the teacher the kid wanted to buy a milf, to which the teacher responded

“Oh no, we don’t do that here.”

[They did actually make a deal to buy the cow]

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