Regular

  • “Are you talking about sushi?” ‘No, we’re talking about suicide darling’
  • “I LOVE SARCASTIC LESBIANS”
  • “Yes I have a bowl cut, but that’s where my power comes from”
  • “Like, I know you’re gay, but I dunno if you’re like, half gay or full gay or what?”
  • “I cannot adjective my emotions correctly”
  • “I was this close to sexually exploiting myself”
  • “AND THE LORD COMETH DOWN UPON THIS LAND ANS SAID ‘YEET’”

Regular

Mom: Millenials are so lazy though. They don’t even have proper jobs!

Me: Do you know…what a millenial…is?

Mom: Yes, of course! [unemployed, depressed uncle’s name] is a millenial.

Me: So this is just you insulting him.

Mom: What? No! I’m always kind to my little brother.

Me: Sure. But you do realise that if you were born literally just one year later, you would count as a millenial?

Mom:

Mom: o H S h I t

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